theawkwardlifeofapsycho:

Why is this not taught universally.

twlboaj:

on a scale from Matilda to Carrie how well do you handle having telekinesis and terrible parents

tilltheend-12:

"your crush is coming in this way"
" what should i do?????"
"act normally"
"okay"

image

dildoreo:

dildoreo:

one time i took a picture of a tiger at the zoo and the tiger smiled for the picture it was very great and the best picture i’ve ever taken

image

causally:

YOU WANNA GO *gives you flowers* ON A DATE

PE Teacher: why are you running so slowly
Me: It does not matter how slow you go, as long as you do not stop - Wisdom of Confucius

snevib:

having 3 friends is a lot of work

graffeti:

my grandma is angry at my grandpa because when they went to the doctors the lady asked what he was allergic to and he said his wife

pornstarbucks:

siri what the hell

dxcade:

DO U EVEN LIFT MR WAYNE

meadowkitten:

*points to ur lap* is this seat taken

combeferret:

yo but this says so much about rape when a woman would literally rather be around a murderer than a rapist

taggedbooty:

unhealthy you say? the apple i ate when i was 7 years old begs to differ 

AT